Some adaptations we'd rather forget! (Part 1)
, by Quentin
The world of video games has given us the opportunity to discover some great works of art, some spellbinding gems, and occasionally, directors have been inspired to adapt them for the big screen and make feature-length films out of them. Unfortunately, cinema and video games have never had a great love affair.
So let's all go on a journey and (re)discover a handful of adaptations. Of course, some of them are great fun to watch with friends, while others are so mediocre and tasteless that we can't even laugh at them. Take a seat and let's talk about a few films we'd (really) like to forget.
Doom
When the source material has a cult following, but lacks a compelling storyline, it's hard to create a gripping work of art in theaters. This is unfortunately what happened with Doom, the legendary and innovative FPS series, which was turned into a film starring Dwayne Johnson.
We have to admit, though, that this 2005 film, directed by Andrzej Bartkowiak, has become, in our opinion, a good nanar to watch in the evening. It will make you put your brain down in front of the TV for 1 h 45, but it will at least have the merit of making you laugh. What's more, it has a few interesting ideas and some rather nice scenes.
Such is the case of a phase that pays homage to the original game's genre by having us switch to first-person view for a few minutes. It's an exhilarating and well-handled experience.
Super Mario Bros. (1993)
Let's take a look at a great disappointment, and no, we're not talking about the excellent animated film released in 2023 and directed by the Illumination teams. Instead, we're going to take a look at the 1993 feature film Super Mario Bros..
Gone is the totally 3D universe with its shimmering colors and atmosphere. This film features real actors and, above all, is a far cry from the enchanting world of the two plumber brothers.
Directed by Rocky Morton and Annabel Jankel, the film features questionable performances from Bob Hoskins as Mario and John Leguizamo as Luigi. Everything about this film is kitsch, from the acting to the overall atmosphere and music.
But then again, we'd recommend seeing it with more than one person, for a much funnier experience than alone.
Hitman
Things are a little different here. Here's a film that takes itself far too seriously, so much so that it's hard to get attached to it or make fun of it. Hitman tries to be a good adaptation, but lacks all the necessary assets.
Timothy Olyphant, who plays Agent 47, has neither the coolness nor the charisma of this cult video game character. Nor does Xavier Gens' direction, which struggles to convince us.
The end result is an insipid film that doesn't thrill us, and isn't "naff" enough to make us laugh out loud. It's really hard for us to recommend that you watch this film, which was released in theaters back in 2007.
Assassin's Creed
Nowhere near as bad as Hitman, the Assassin's Creed movie was serviceable enough, but also sadly forgettable. You know that moment when you walk out of the cinema having forgotten almost the whole thing within minutes?
Well, that's the kind of feeling that Assassin's Creed inspires. However, we had a rather interesting casting with Marion Cotillard or even Brendan Gleeson. But that's not enough to make this an outstanding adaptation.
The story isn't really that interesting, Justin Kurzel's direction doesn't make us jump through hoops and, like Hitman, it lacks the quirkiness to make it endearing. It's a film that will be forgotten over the years.
Mortal Kombat (circa 1995)
So, back to films that don't take themselves too seriously. We're going to continue with three adaptations of fighting games.
Here again, you'll rightly ask yourself "what's the big idea?" Well, we don't have the answer to that question. Let's start with Mortal Kombat, released in 1995 and directed by Paul W. S. Anderson.
Does the name ring any bells? He was behind the Resident Evil saga on the silver screen with his wife, Milla Jovovich.
In this film, the acting is bad. Really bad. Even Christophe Lambert, who is a well-known actor, can't cope, and gives the impression of not wanting to be there. The confrontations and fights are ridiculous and a far cry from the gore and intensity of video games. But at the same time, how can you work miracles with such a basic premise...
Street Fighter (1995)
We know that this one holds a place in the hearts of many viewers. After all, it's extremely funny to find Jean-Claude Van Damme or even Kylie Minogue in Street Fighter.
But its director, Steven E. de Souza, should have stayed in his role as screenwriter. He had already proved his worth on the first two Die Hard films.
Like many of the productions we've covered in this selection, this one is well worth a detour, even if only to dissuade future generations from making fighting game adaptations.
Tekken
We end this selection on a high note. Well, not really, since we're going to talk about Tekken, a 2010 film directed by Dwight H. Little.
A far cry from the quirkiness offered by Mortal Kombat or Street Fighter, this one is rather trashy.
It's going to be difficult for us to extract the slightest quality from it: it's a cinematic abomination on every level. You're not dreaming, there's nothing good about this film! And even for a laugh, we wouldn't recommend wasting 1 h 30 of your life on it.
Think about what can be done in 90 minutes! At least, a lot more interesting things than watching this... I don't know what to call it.
So, of course, we haven't included every possible adaptation. On the one hand, that would require a good ten parts, and we'd love to spare you that. On the other hand, some were either extremely well known, as in the case of Resident Evil and its cinematic spawn, or were more than adequate feature films, such as Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time or even Warcraft.
However, there are a few outstanding works missing, but not for the right reasons. And for that, we have to turn to German director Uwe Boll, who is an expert in the field, with a large number of video games adapted into films to his credit. We'll be back soon with a special feature on his creations.